June 4, 2004
Iqaluit's Mary Deschenes dies at 44
"She wanted to
see everyone around her happy"
GREG YOUNGER-LEWIS
Mary Deschenes relaxes during Christmas holidays with her grandson Justin. (PHOTO
COURTESY OF MICHELENE KILABUK-COTÉ)
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Family and friends gathered in Iqaluit's cemetery for Mary Deschenes' funeral
on June 3, recalling her as a friendly, caring person who loved to cook for
anyone in need.
Deschenes, 44, was found dead in her house on May 26.
A mother of three and grandmother of five, Deschenes was born and grew up in
Iqaluit, working at various jobs, including road construction, plumbing and,
most recently, cooking and organizing activities at the elders' residence. She
also worked for years at the video outlet named after her, Mary's Movie Club.
Family said they admired how Deschenes took time, whenever possible, to play
games with them, like bingo, cards and Scrabble, even though she often found
them too slow, and joked that time limits should be enforced.
Others recall Deschenes as the woman who was thrust into an unwanted spotlight
after she fatally stabbed an abusive boyfriend in a drunken fight three years
ago.
After a jury convicted her of manslaughter, a judge sentenced her to nine months
of house arrest, which she served in the apartment where the death occurred.
Family said the Iqaluit Housing Authority refused to transfer her to another
unit.
"She had to walk into that same unit every day, knowing that this happened,"
said her oldest daughter, Jackie. "Unfortunately, my mother was a victim.
We just learn from that and move forward. It just made us stronger knowing that
our family stuck by each other."
Her daughters remembered how she would come into their home, and immediately
start tidying up the house. She was also famous among friends for going into
the kitchen and preparing her favourite dishes, including fried caribou or clam
chowder.
"She didn't want to live in the past," Jackie said. "She lived
her life day to day. She fulfilled the day, and made sure it was a good day."
Days before police found her body, Mary Deschenes was laughing heartily on
the telephone with her long-time friend, Elisapee Gordon.
She talked at length about her plans for a three-week vacation in the Annapolis
Valley in Nova Scotia, and spending time with her five-year-old granddaughter.
The plane ticket was already paid for.
"She just loved being a mother," Jackie said. "She was just
a people person. She wanted to see everyone around her happy."
RCMP officials declined to comment on the cause of death until autopsy results
arrive in the next two months. Homicide has been ruled out.
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